It’s Business Time, So Here’s to Never Shutting Up

I haven’t written on this blog in what seems like ages. I suppose its because I’ve been in a bit of rut. Writing A Life Full of Glitter took more out of me than I originally realized. On top of that, life has been hard to the ones I love and I’ve made it a priority to be there for them. That’s the rough spot about being in the position I am, my energy is asked for in so many places and sometimes I just burn out because I’ve spread myself too thin. It’s the people pleaser in me. I just want everyone to be a little bit happier.

One of the things that was 100% holding me back was my silly belief I could actually make everyone happy with what I create. That if I worked really really hard and put all my heart into it that eventually I would unlock some secret formula to the perfect piece of prose and imagery. However, the comments and engagement on my content only got more polarizing, I only became more and more distraught.

My content creation became backed in fear. I would get anxious every time I posted something. What would they hate about me today? How would I fail to deliver? Sometimes it was the fit of my pants. Sometimes it was misunderstandings. Sometimes it was the color of my shirt. Some days it was my make up. Every day there was a new reason for people to be disappointed in me. This was all I could see. The failures.

So i began to take my heart out of the work, and I wasn’t as me as I have been before. I’d never really had anxiety and I didn’t know how to deal with it. I had to learn new skills and evolve my coping mechanisms. It sucked. It’s great to be popular on the internet, but the mental demands it creates on you are intense. I had to recalibrate and learn to live in this new state of affairs. I have over 800,000 followers across channels. I will not and cannot please them all everyday and I would lose my ability to be happy if I keep trying to.

I am still working on it, being ok with where this has all grown to. I am tremendously uncomfortable with quasi-internet fame. However today while shooting I mentioned to my photographer and long time friend Joey I was considering leaving influencer work behind. He looked me in the eyes and said confidently, ” What you create is needed and I know you don’t feel strong enough, but you are. You were meant for this. You get to be the voice for people who aren’t always heard. That’s a gift.” As we walked into the sun to shoot I thought to myself, “here’s to never shutting up.”

                Outfit Details: Lane Bryant forest green blazer and pants, Eloquii penguin print blouse,

Sperry grey loafers, Asos plaid beret

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What Fearless Looks Like

As I left my apartment to shoot this look I thought to myself, “is this pink fur too over the top?” It was very bright and I questioned if I was going just an teeny tiny bit over board. Yes, even the most experimental of fashion goddesses sometimes question how they’ve put things together.

As I rounded the corner to where I intended to shoot, an old Italian woman, dressed impeccably, stopped me. She grabbed my shoulder and whispered softly in my ear, “You. This….This is how a woman should dress. She should be fearless.” She smiled and went on her way.

As I set my camera up, I thought about her words. Fearlessness. It’s something that we all should embrace more. If we could live each day as if nothing scared us, as if nothing made us doubt ourselves, and as if nothing stood in our way, how would our lives be different?

I don’t have the magic answer to that deep question, but I do have a photo of the moment I decided to try just a little bit hard to face life with less fear. Well, I have several.

Today fearlessness is bright red pants with gold buttons and a white blouse twisted and tucked into their waist line. It’s a cotton candy pink faux fur coat (similar), gold lame shoes, and a vintage style jeweled bag. It’s this moment in time where I was reminded to question my inspiration less, and trust my gut more. Today, this is what fearless looks like.

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The Perfect Plus Size Look for a Casual NYE

New Year’s Eve is sold to us as an event we must dress up for- a night that doesn’t demand glam, full make up and perfect hair; it requires it. I’ve always thought to myself, why? Look we all know the majority of people going anywhere for New Year’s are going to be giggly drunk by the time that shiny ball drops. They’re going to mess up their make up, they’re likely going to get their hair/dress/dignity caught on something, and we both know they will accidentally spill cheap champagne all over that fancy dress.

Why not  just go casual for  the night? Is this crazy talk?  Somehow I just feel like I’m more likely to survive the night of nights in a track suit than a designer gown.

Here’s what I to wear to New Year’s- a sweatshirt (alternative), over leggings and a t-shirt dress (alternative) and finished with a pair of shoes that implied I tried when I obviously didn’t.  Sure, I’d even throw in some big earrings. I’d pretend it’s a “bold alternative choice,” but it’s really just a comfort presented as a style win.

I might not be the most glamorous girlat the ball, but I wont have to worry about my dress creeping up, accidentally exposing my day of the week underwear. I wont have to fret about anything being unpredictably painful… or itchy… or just plain breaking. I wont have to topple around in crazy high stilettos. I’ll just set myself up for a great night, with a reduced chance of a casualty. That’s something pretty special if you ask me.

The Power of Fancy Pants

The Power of Fancy Pants

As I look at my computer screen right now I have 21% battery left. I’ve decided that I’ve got just until that battery fades to finish this post. I guess that’s how I achieve work/life balance, by constantly some how managing to do the impossible in too little time on too little sleep. Man am I tired. It’s been a hard day, but the good kind where you know the exhaustion will pay off in progress.  Data is passed out at my feet and making soft whimpers as I type. I have never been more jealous of him. First things first, since most of you will read this blog solely to get the details on these very fancy pants, I will indulge you sooner rather than later. These floral harem pants are from ASOS and the pink top is from Eloquii. I like it because it has a bow in the back, just like me-secretly girly. The gilded sandals are Crocs, because it’s hot and I just want to be comfortable. Lastly, the jewelry is a set I almost missed my flight home from Delhi, India for.  Good accessories are important.

I wore these pants today, because some days we simply dress to make ourselves stronger. Today was one of those days. After a hellacious trip into NYC last night, I just wanted to wear something bright, as a symbol I would not back down if the day decided to get hard. No white flag would be waved. And I would not just seize the day; I would do it boldly and with as much confidence as one can wearing floral harem pants.

Today, I wanted to be seen.

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Neon Pheonix Bikini Pool Time Realness

Neon Pheonix Bikini Pool Time Realness


I can’t not share this look. I am on cloud nine as a result of its bold colors, sassy flounced hems, and sassy shades. I feel like the might phoenix of the pool. A bold bird rising up from the ashes of the work week- born anew in the gold rays of the sun. Bonus, the suit is so comfortable and I feel content in the fact I turned a totally fugly shirt, into a totally adorable cover up simply by slicing it down the front.
Here’s the details on the pieces I am rocking in this look.

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